Listening Is an Act of Love

A few days ago, Robin mentioned that she'd read an article about StoryCorps; she knew I was seeking to align myself with more meaningful work, and thought I'd resonate with this organization. She was right, of course. (Robin is always right about me.) I think I have cried through every single StoryCorps story I've ever heard on NPR's Morning Edition. It never occurred to me that I might actually get involved in this organization until Robin mentioned it.

I went to the StoryCorps web site immediately, and noticed a sidebar call-out that said "Listening Is an Act of Love." YES. I have long contended that listening is the greatest healing we can offer each other. I wrote this down on a post-it and stuck it onto my computer monitor. A few hours later, I had my bi-weekly call with Martha, my beloved Life Coach. Toward the end of the call, I mentioned StoryCorps and my new favorite slogan. I explained the click of alignment this slogan triggered––that for the first time I understood the art of the shared story to be my True North: a path of healing through the co-creation of reality.

"I have to tell you something, Sage." Martha's voice sounded heightened, as if there were a sudden electrical current running between us. "Listening Is an Act of Love is a book--a collection of stories that just came out last week." She laughed a little. "And I have a story in it."

"It is? You DO?!" I was incredulous.

"Yes, my daughter-in-law Brittany interviewed me last year in the StoryCorps booth, and they included my interview in the book." Incredibly, Martha also pointed out that there was a book signing in Portland the next night.

I was literally jumping up and down with excitement. I didn't ask Martha what the story was about; I knew it would change me, as all of the others had, and my instinct was to wait and savor its full impact from start to finish, as Martha had originally spoken it.

My work with Martha began four years ago, as part of my life coach training at Falling Awake. We were required to work with a coach for a year, and I was advised that Martha could be a powerful guide for me: a wise woman with a corporate past and a spiritually alive present. I chose Martha then, and have continued working with her ever since. In all this time, as we focus intensely on my own personal and professional trajectory, I have come to know Martha not through her stories but through  her presence, which has been one of the rarest and most precious gifts in my life: a joyous, mystical, knowing, divining, celebratory, receptive and reflective presence. I know only a meager handful of facts about Martha's life and what has shaped her into the Ambassador of The Divine that she is today. I drove eagerly through the slanting rain of a dark Portland night to experience Martha from the seat in which she typically sits, as an engaged listener.

At the Oregon Public Broadcasting studios, I walked straight to the book table and bought a copy of Listening Is an Act of Love. There were maybe 10 minutes before Dave Isay, the project founder and book editor, would begin his presentation. I shakily flipped through until arriving at page 105, which had Martha's name at the top and began with this italicized introduction:

Martha Conant was aboard United Airlines flight 232, which crashed in Sioux City, Iowa, on July 19, 1989. Of the 296 people on board, 111 perished. Most of the others were seriously injured.

I'm not going to tell you what happens from here, because it's Martha's story, not mine. But I will tell you that the ways in which this tragedy unfolded into a legacy of gifts for Martha and the people whose lives she touches broke open some untraveled chamber of my heart. I had no idea––and was absolutely shocked to learn––that Martha had survived an airplane crash. Her expressed resolve to live with no regrets shed new light on the resounding delight with life that Martha contagiously exudes.

There is much I will never know about how the people I cherish have been shaped by events which were then further sculpted by the stories told about those events. As I wept through Martha's remarkable story and the recordings of everyday people telling the extraordinary moments of their lives, a double-helix of grief and joy turned through me. Telling stories is a way of exalting our pain to new thresholds of acceptance. And listening is the portal through which we are escorted to such moments of grace. 

I hope you will buy Listening Is an Act of Love and experience for yourself the rare gifts that Martha and every other featured storyteller contribute to our shared perception of American life. All book proceeds fund the StoryCorp project, the largest oral history project of its kind, whose mission is to honor and celebrate one another’s lives through listening. Each of the tens of thousands of conversations are archived for generations to come at the Library of Congress.

Listening is an act of love. I hope we all remember how much we have to give, simply by fully receiving the stories we are told.

Comments

[The Writer Mama]

Very cool. I have been seeing the book promoted elsewhere, possibly everywhere, since we spoke about it.

I was struck by the reversal, that Martha is usually your listener, focused on you, and then the way it all reversed. Nice.

I also noticed that the name, Storycorp, sounded familiar when you first told me, and I remember the first flood of news about the project, and now look at how it has grown and flourished.

Thanks for sharing this story.